Watertown NY 04.13.2024 By Hans Wilder
Ladies and gentlemen, gather ’round for the sequel no one really asked for but everyone saw coming: “Trump 2024: Still the 45th, Believe It or Not!” You see, in the fantastic realm of political wizardry, we’ve got a plot twist that bends time, space, and common sense—Donald Trump, if victorious in 2024, insists he’s still the 45th President. Why? Because, in his world, he never stopped being the winner.
Now, in this political circus, every Republican on the ticket must swear on a stack of voter ballots that Trump was, is, and forever will be the legitimate 45th President, defying both history and arithmetic in one fell swoop. It’s not just a campaign; it’s a revival tour with all the greatest hits, including the classics like “Stop the Steal” and “Fake News Fiesta.”
But let’s dive deeper, shall we? By proclaiming Trump the eternal 45th, we’re not just bending the rules of presidential succession; we’re entering a twilight zone where past presidencies might just be a state of mind. And for Trump to run again and still be the 45th? Well, that’s like watching a rerun of your least favorite show but the episodes keep claiming they’re brand new.
Now, let’s sprinkle a bit of conspiracy confetti into the mix. The insistence that recognizing Trump’s eternal presidency is akin to acknowledging the sky is blue or that water is wet. It’s not about what happened; it’s about what should have happened according to the gospel of the Grand Old Party.
And in this grand narrative, every good story needs a villain, right? Enter the International Deep State, that nebulous entity playing 4D chess in the dark, supposedly aligning with Putin while pretending to orchestrate global affairs. It’s a script so convoluted that not even the best soap opera writers could dream it up.
So, as we gear up for 2024, remember, folks, this isn’t just about electing a president. It’s about enshrining a legend, a myth, a meme into the annals of American history. Trump doesn’t just want to win an election; he wants to win the narrative, to remain unchallenged and unchanged as the forever 45th.
Buckle up, America! The show’s about to start, and whether you love it or hate it, you can’t ignore the absurdity of it all. In the grand theater of American politics, sometimes it’s hard to tell whether we’re the audience… or the punchline. And always remember, in this saga, the clowns aren’t just in the circus; they’re running it.
