Title: iPhone SE 4: Another Overpriced Brick You’ll Buy Anyway
By Hans Wilder, Watertown, NY
February 19, 2025
Apple dropped their latest cash grab today—the iPhone SE 4—and Tim Cook’s calling it a “new family member.” What, Siri’s got a cousin now? Cute. Meanwhile, here in Watertown, NY, we’re still scraping ice off our windshields and praying our paychecks stretch to next week. Good luck affording this $499 notch-faced ripoff on an Upstate salary.
Leaks say it’s got a 6.1-inch OLED, an A18 chip, and no Home button—like an iPhone 14 that forgot to grow up. Apple’s hyping it as “affordable,” but $499 plus tax might as well be a mortgage payment when your cell signal drops in a snowstorm. They’ll sell millions anyway, because you suckers love a shiny logo. Designed by Apple, broken in Watertown—literally. Check the pic below: that’s what this thing’ll look like after one winter here.
Cook’s X post this week teased “something special,” but the only special thing is how fast they’ll fleece you. Maybe Elon can buy Apple and fix this nonsense—tag him and see. For now, enjoy your overpriced brick. I’ll stick to my cracked 6S—it still works, unlike our roads.
