FAQs – Because We Know You’ll Ask Anyway
Q: What kind of “news” do you cover?
A: Oh, just the usual – politics, celebrities doing dumb things, world events that depress you, and anything that makes people shout in the comment section. You know, “journalism.”
Q: Is your news real or are you just making stuff up?
A: Real? Ha! We prefer to dance on the fine line between sarcasm, truth, and a sprinkle of chaos. We report, you roll your eyes.
Q: How often do you update the site?
A: Every time something ridiculous happens. Which, let’s be honest, is about every five minutes. You’re welcome.
Q: Can I trust your sources?
A: Trust? In 2024? That’s cute. We use “sources” the same way your neighbor uses their horoscope to make life decisions. But sure, they’re totally legit.
Q: How do I leave a comment on your articles?
A: You simply scroll to the bottom of the article, spew your hot take, and we’ll immediately file it under “nobody cares,” but hey, you do you.
Q: Will my comment get deleted if I’m too honest?
A: We encourage honesty. Brutal, snarky honesty. But if you get too real for our fragile egos or say something smart, we might just hit that delete button. No hard feelings.
Q: Why does your site have so many ads?
A: Because we like money. The more clickbait ads you dodge, the more ramen we can afford. So, uh, keep those ad-blockers off if you want to support “independent journalism.”
Q: Is there a paywall?
A: Paywall? Pfft, no. We’re not that fancy. But if you feel like throwing money at us, we won’t stop you. Venmo works.
Q: How do I contact the editors?
A: Contact us? Wow, that’s bold. But sure, send your email into the void at [email protected]. We might respond if we feel like it (we won’t).
Q: Why should I read your articles?
A: Well, if you’re into sarcasm, cynicism, and being mildly entertained while the world burns, we’re your new favorite news source. If you’re not into that, there’s always Real Serious News for Serious People.com.
Q: Do you take submissions?
A: Oh, you think you can do better? Sure, submit your masterpiece, and we’ll pretend to read it while making finger guns at our reflection.
Q: Can I advertise on your site?
A: If you’ve got money, we’ve got ad space. Your product will be placed strategically between our biting satire and a “One Weird Trick” ad. Classy, right?
Q: Do you have a newsletter?
A: Yeah, it’s basically us reminding you how hilarious we are, once a week, straight to your inbox. Subscribe if you hate joy.
Q: Are you hiring?
A: Always. But be warned: if you don’t speak fluent sarcasm or can’t survive on coffee and memes alone, this might not be the gig for you.
Q: Where do you stand on politics?
A: Somewhere between “Why is everyone yelling?” and “Please stop talking.” Our political coverage is an equal-opportunity offender, so buckle up.
Q: Will you stop being so snarky?
A: Nope. Not ever. Sarcasm is the glue that holds this whole circus together.
Welcome to the FAQ section of Snarky News for Snarky People. Got more questions? Cool. We’ve got more snark.